So I was listening to the radio the other day in the car when aI heard a song that tickled my funny bone and actually had a fun beat. The song was “Tips for Teens” by Sparks. To my surprise, I have discovered that this band has been around since the 70’s and has released critically acclaimed albums as recent as 2006 (ahh, what you can find out on Wikipedia and/or iTunes). Depeche Mode and New Order (two of my favorite bands since childhood) even cite Sparks as a major influence. How is it possible that I’ve never before come across any of their songs in my 3 decades of life? Maybe Mike’s older siblings can weigh in on this since they are a little bit older than me. Anyway, I found this video.
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6MqISz5bH7o
It’s hard to hear the lyrics, so I’ve pasted them below (I literally laughed out loud when I saw the portion I’ve highlighted below):
I’ve got a snapshot of your Aunt Maureen
She’s 90 and you’re a teen
I’m trying to cheer you up
Don’t be so mean, don’t be so mean
Crach, bam, now you’re looking good
Tip Top, now you’re feeling good
Once more, here’s your Aunt Maureen
Don’t you feel good, don’t you feel good
Chorus:
Tips For Teens, Tips For Teens, the kind
you don’t see in magazines
Tips For Teens, Tips For Teens, the kind
you don’t see on T.V. screens
Tips For Teens, Tips For Teens
Wake up to music
And say you’re too sick to go to work
Soon, you will lose all your zits
Tight sweaters no longer fit
Jetsetters will make their pitch
I told you so, I told you so
Chorus
Don’t eat that ice cream
It is vanilla
Give it to me
Don’t eat that pastry
What’s in the middle
Give it to me
Don’t eat that burger
Has it got mayonnaise
Give it to me
Keep that mystique up
And wear a “D” cup
No matter what
Don’t eat no curry
Before a very
Important date
Do I look so knowing and old and wise
Maby it’s those Dacron ties
How come you keep asking me
For Tips For Teens, for Tips For Teens
Crach, bam, now you’re looking good
Tip Top, now you’re feeling good
Once more, here’s your Aunt Maureen
Don’t you feel good, don’t you feel good
Of course, I couldn’t conclude without disclosing the fact that they have a song called “Moustache”. This is just for you Mike:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8yN_6KIxxw&feature=related
Can you tell that I’ve got nothing better to do on a Saturday night with Mike out of town (::snicker::)?